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End of Year News (December 2017)

Thu Dec 28, 2017 3:57 am by Adrian

(It's been one year since I made a news thread, oops)

Merry Christmas/Festivus/whatever holiday you do or do not celebrate!

2017 was a pretty busy year IRL for most of us - according to forum statistics, our busiest month was in June with 1671 total posts, meaning our post rate has been a little …

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Forum Bug

Wed Dec 28, 2016 3:18 am by Adrian

Hi all,

We're aware of a peculiar forum glitch that's causing some subforums to be locked.

Due to the lateness at this time, it might be a while before the glitch can be remedied, because despite my best efforts and as far as I can tell, everything seems to be working fine admin-side. It may have …

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Discord News/Update Test

Thu Dec 08, 2016 1:35 am by Adrian

Just a news, update test. Trying to get this thing to work.

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For her own good.

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For her own good.

Post by Salphirix on Wed Aug 05, 2015 1:11 am

Before I knew it, it had started. The growing feeling in your chest that caused your heart to speed up, and force you awake no matter how much you laid there, trying to get them off your mind. You began to do anything in your power to make them content, mostly because seeing them unhappy brought you a great deal of pain. It made things around you become less important, as all your attention was on them. Before you knew it you wanted to be near them more, hear their sweet voice, and watch as smiles grew on their rosey face.

At first, I wouldn't even admit it, but as time passed I couldn't help but come to terms with it.

I loved her.

There was no denying it.

“I had fun today, Keiran, I really did,” Caroline beamed up at me, the corners of her lips moving to either side of her face.

“I did too.”

“I wish we could do this more often,” she added softly, looking down at the snow caked ground, run over by many feet of all sizes.

I thought back for a moment, going over what we had done today. It started this morning when Caroline had suggested we go to the park on my day off. I hadn’t complained or denied it, so we spent a good amount of time there mostly throwing around unpackable snow. Once she had gotten too cold to continue we hit up a Cafe, spending most of our evening there talking about whatever came to mind. She mostly talked about herself, probably because whenever she asked me anything I insisted on knowing more about her. She talked mostly about the orphanage, and how she hated it there because it was boring and all her friends kept getting adopted without her. Also about how she liked both the colors pink and grey, despite people calling her a yellow kind of girl. She even went on to say she hasn’t spent a Christmas with anyone since she was eight.

After that we spent the rest of the day window shopping, her picks of course. It was actually quite fun watching her face light up when she saw something that spiked her interest. It was. . . cute, actually. She had even tried on a few bracelets and coats, but in the end I bought her a pink and grey plaid scarf that fit our budget.

Now we were walking through the dead streets of N’al Ren, the sun close to dead leaving a majority of the sky clear and star speckled.

“If you want to do this again next week we can,” I looked over to her, watching as her purple irises returned back to mine.

“Really!? That’s great!” She let a laugh escape between her parted lips, which brought my chest to feel a little lighter. Even after four weeks of living with her whenever she laughed it made me feel at ease. Hearing her joy brought me the same.

“We can keep doing this every weekend too, if you’d like of course,” I offered.

“I would love that, really.”

“Then I promise to take you every weekend out like this,”

“Will it be a date, then?”

I paused from speaking for the moment, “If you want to call it that, sure.”

Again, she laughed, but stopped walking this time. I looked behind me, stopping a bit aways and watching as she began to laugh a lot more, like someone had told the best joke she’d ever heard. I was almost concerned for her after a few seconds, but it was kinda funny at the same time.

She stared me in the eyes, still laughing a little, “Seriously, thank you. I don’t think I’ve had fun like this in a long time. Or even felt this happy before I met you.”

I walked back over to her, “If it makes you happy that’s all that matters, there’s no need to thank me.”

“But, I do need to thank you! You’re the first person who’s actually wanted to make me happy,” she suddenly grabbed my hands, which took me by surprise, “Keiran, you make me so happy I--.”

She stopped, obvious rose blush creeping onto her face as she squeezed my hands once before letting go. Silence took us over as we just sat there, staring at one another.

Without much thought I lean down to her height and kiss her. When our lips had first locked I felt an overwhelming wave of joy, and seeing how happy she looked after it continued to build that joy.

"Once more," she breathed before standing on her tippy toes to reach my lips once again. They were soft and warm, contrasting to mine. Though that didn't matter.

All that mattered was us.

We pulled away again and stared into one another's eyes. There was too much I wanted to say.

"Caroline. . ."

"Hmm?" She cooed, almost sounding taunting.

"I like you, a lot."

Her expression became warm, "I know, I do too."

I took this moment to cup her face in my hands and kiss her harder, parting for a second before returning again.

My hands moved from her face to a tight hug that meshed our bodies together while still kissing her. I felt as if I'd lose her if I didn't. And I refused to let her go so easily. Now that we were one in the same there was no way I'd dare to.

Caroline was mine.

And I was going to continue to make her happy because I wanted to.

* * *

Before I knew it, two weeks had passed since that night we had become a thing. It was awkward the first few days, because neither of us actually knew how a relationship had worked. But overtime we had seemed to grow pretty comfortable. Kinda? Either way it was nice, being with her made me feel a bit more relaxed but at the same time tentative. I always felt like I had to do things a certain way, or please her, or I wasn’t good enough for her. I was afraid she’d find out about my dark secrets and become scared of me.

What if she’d never want to see me again?

Or what if she didn't like who I was after some time?

Those had been common thoughts during all of this. But don’t get me wrong, they weren’t all negative. I had a lot of positives too.

It was nice knowing I was coming home to someone who actually had feelings for me, even though I always wanted to talk about her and I had this bad habit of being grumpy in the morning.

“I made us dinner, I hope Macaroni and Cheese is okay. . . We didn’t have much,” Caroline popped out from the Kitchen as I entered the apartment.

“That’s fine, hopefully this week’s paycheck will be larger than the last.”

“Maybe I should stop having you buy me things on the weekend, I feel like it’s my fault we’re broke. . .” She vanished again after saying.

“Don’t think that, I like buying you things,” Assuring her as I headed towards the kitchen, I met with Caroline again holding two bowls of what was going to be our dinner.

“Sorry. . .” She blushed and looked away, handing me one of them before hurrying to the couch where we typically ate.

I joined her, sitting on the opposite end.

“How was work?” Caroline attempted in making conversation.

I muttered, “Dumb and boring, like usual,”

“You know, you actually never told me where you work. . .”

“Downtown where you’d never want to go. The area sucks but the pay is what keeps me here,” I lie.

“Oh, I see. . .”

“Yea, but don’t worry I’m fine. I haven’t died yet.”

“That’s true. I think you’d kill them first,” Carol joked, which stung a little. She didn’t know, I couldn’t blame her, but it still hurt inside.

“No, I wouldn’t want to kill anyone.”

Nervously laughing she replied, “Yea, I-I know you wouldn’t. I was just joking. You’re a good person.”

“Nah, you’re the good person,” I looked over to her, only to realize she had scooted her way over next to me. She gave me a silly grin and leaned against me.

“We’re both good people, deal?”

I smirked, allowing her to nestle into my side, “Fine with me.”

* * *

I knew I had f***** up when our eyes met. It was a work day, but I was out doing what my usual work consisted of. Stealing. That’s what I had to do to make a living. But I hadn’t told Caroline that. I had told her I worked downtown, which was a good ways away. And there was no explaining why I was still out and about. I couldn’t tell her I had the day off actually, I couldn’t say that I was fired because then I’d have to make a new excuse, and from the look on her face she knew other things I was hiding.

I was pretty sure she’d found out something a few days ago, because she acted a lot different then how her usual attitude was.

But she played it off.

So I did too.

She booked it back to direction of our apartment, and I followed in pursuit. I knew this wasn’t going to go well, I knew she’d be upset.

Gods. I f***** up.

“Please, don’t cry. . .” I reached out to her as I followed her into the apartment room, but she slapped me away

“I just feel like I’m doing everything wrong! You’re either lying to me or hiding everything from me so I don’t know what to do! Aren’t we supposed to be honest with each other?”

“We are--I’m not lying,” I frowned.

“Do you even like me? Is that a lie too?”

“Caroline, of course I like you.”

“Then why are you hiding so much from me!? I know you’re not eightteen like you claim, I saw the paperwork, and now you lied about where you work! What else are you hiding?”

I put my face in my hands, taking a moment to breathe and calm myself down before I did or said something I’d later regret, “There’s things about me you wouldn’t want to know.”

“Of course I want to know! Because I want to know if the person I think I love is actually who they say they are!”

I lifted my face from my hands slowly, looking at her with a heavy heart. Her purple eyes were red and swollen, her face wet with the tears that we still falling from her face. She was sniffling constantly, trying to wipe away the tears with her sweater as she continued to look at me.

I knew at this point it was no use. We’d never be able to together like I thought we would.

There was too much about me she didn’t know, that she couldn’t know. I’d never be able to tell her about the demon inside me. I’d never be able to admit I was the one who killed her parents. I’d never be able to make her happy like I thought I could despite how hard I tried and wanted to.

Because really? I had screwed her life over in too many ways that there was no way I’d be able to fix that. I was a fool to think doing this would make her happy. In the end I was just hurting her even more with my stupid, selfish acts.

That was why I had to do what I was about to.

My hands slowly moved to the sides of her head, luckily this time she hadn’t pushed me away. My expression was cold and dark, which probably was probably for the best for her memories at this point and how they saw me before being arranged. Within a few seconds her tears stopped, her eyes becoming dulled over.

I had seen this once before, the same dead expression of a purple eyed girl who’s life had been screwed over by yours truly. She was eight at the time, and I had hoped this method would have completely erased the memory of when I had lost control of the demon inside me. But it hadn’t.

But now, it should have at least erased her memory of us.

Still, though, it killed me inside.

I couldn't remember the last time I had cried.

I considered myself a strong guy, not one to easily be persuaded by emotion given the certain circumstances I was still going through.

However, having to rearrange her memories like that so she'd forget it all felt like everything I had ever wanted and needed had vanished right in front of my eyes.

Caroline was the one I loved. The only one I'd probably ever love.

But I had to give her away.

For our own good.

For her own good.

Yes. This is canon. This isn't fanfiction.
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Re: For her own good.

Post by Hime on Wed Aug 05, 2015 1:19 am

OH MY GOSH!!! This is so conflicting!! Why do you do this to my feelings? This was so cute/sad/well-written! Cameline and Kieroline (if that's the right ship name Razz) are fighting battles in my brain.

I loved it!

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Re: For her own good.

Post by Salphirix on Wed Aug 05, 2015 1:25 am

I don't think we've made an official ship name for Keiorline (but that sounds good to me unless someone can make something better xD)

But I'm glad you liked it, sorry about the feels xDD

Last edited by Lyssy-chan on Wed Aug 05, 2015 1:29 am; edited 1 time in total
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Re: For her own good.

Post by Fix-It on Wed Aug 05, 2015 1:28 am

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Re: For her own good.

Post by WritingBookworm on Wed Aug 05, 2015 1:35 am

Lyssy . . . why did you do this . . . and no I'm not crying I'm just sweating through my eyes why do you ask?

But yeah I think I'm just gonna read that again because of HOW GOOD IT WAS LIKE OH MY GOSH. Seriously well done!
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Re: For her own good.

Post by Athena Lionheart on Wed Aug 05, 2015 1:35 am

Brilliantly written. I love these characters so much. I never want you to complain about your writing abilities again, you're improving with every day! Very Happy
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Re: For her own good.

Post by Salphirix on Wed Aug 05, 2015 1:38 am

*Flailing atm*

Thank you!! >w<
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Re: For her own good.

Post by Kane on Wed Aug 05, 2015 1:42 am

Keiorline ftw
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Re: For her own good.

Post by Salphirix on Wed Aug 05, 2015 3:43 am

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Re: For her own good.

Post by Omni on Wed Aug 05, 2015 11:08 am

Very nice. I feel like you did a good job setting the tone of their relationship two weeks in--not too lovey-dovey, but caring and comfortable. Not as dramatic as a lot of what you tend to see in RPs and quick fics like this, but a lot more honest... Which makes it even better when you take it away and ruin that poor kid's life. The prose itself is serviceable, and can only get better with practice. You're a good writer, Lyssy, and you've got the potential to be a pretty great one.
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Re: For her own good.

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